The Little Flower

What shall I say? Let us make a return to the Lord, for He is good and forgiving, slow to anger and rich in kindness. To the hungry He brings good things, and the rich He has sent away empty. Let us pour ourselves out as the Little Flower did, be rich in word and deed for others, and sacrificial in our service—no matter or place in life. We are called to do good and to be love for one another. Let us seek out the good, for our time is short. Let us seek out the good and think better of others and trust in the Lord. Let us share that goodwill and be present to those in our midst and count not the cost of love.

"O little martyr of Love, you know now even better than in the days of your pilgrimage that Love embraces all vocations; that it is Love alone which counts, which unites us perfectly to God and conforms our will with His. All you sought on earth was love; to love Jesus as He had never yet been loved. Use your power in heaven to make us love Him. If only we love Him we shall desire to make Him loved by others; we shall pray much for souls. We shall no longer fear death, for it will unite us to Him forever. Obtain for us the grace to do all for the love of God, to give Him pleasure, to love Him so well that He may be pleased with us as He was with you.

Intercede for us all the days of our life, but especially during this Novena and obtain for us from God the graces and favors we ask through your intercession. Amen."

"Thought for the day: Love of God. I will love God alone and will not have the misfortune of attaching myself to creatures, now that my heart perceive what He has in store for those who love Him.

What attracts me to the kingdom of Heaven is the call of our Lord, the hope of loving Him as I have so desired and the thought that I shall be able to make Him loved by a great number of souls who will bless Him forever.

When Christ said, "Give Me a Drink," it was the love of His poor creatures that He, the Creator of all things, desired. He thirsted for love.

Remember that the dear Jesus is there in the tabernacle expressly for you, for you alone. Remember that He is consumed with a desire to come into your heart." - EWTN's "Little Flower Novena"

Prayer of the Family

How do I foolishly desire to be rid of the darkness of trial and temptation, insofar as my dimmed understanding permits me even to express now. It is not a matter of temptation to love something more than God that ones striving towards the Holy One should be most concerned about, though proper ordering of love is a prudent necessity. No, it is the temptation to doubt the gift given to one who experiences great trial and doubt in response. This darkness in question is the poisonous fumes of doubt that question the gifts because of oneself. They wrongly question the giver's sanity and not the standard of the gifted that one visits review upon and to whom the talents have been given.

A lack of response to prayer is not a lack of prayer. A lack of receptivity in so-called prayer is itself the absence of true prayer, not the feeling of emptiness or fullness. We are earthen vessels who are prone to seeping that which we are filled with; neither can we fill without first being open to receiving. Love must be the act of will present in prayer to be open to the blinding fires of Love before us if we are ready to be refined in and proved through this refining fire of Love.

O Act of Love... in thee I stand. With thee I pray, those indescribable words in exaltation to Him Who Is... May I too be bound by the Holy Family through which all instruction took form and place from of youth and until His Bloody Passion as the Paschal Lamb.

O St. Joseph, patron of the Universal Church and patron saint of families... I choose thee in this same love for my family to be. Dear St. Joseph, pray for all of our families in all their states and dispositions, that they may mirror the Trinity in love. St. Joseph, especially pray for my family and spouse to be. May I mirror your love in chastity to give myself to her in fruitful and unyielding love. May your prayers usher God's grace in me to be patient in its timing and form, that I may not grow hasty or worried over any outward appearance of failure but trust in the Heralds of God who announce the Good News. May God grant the peace necessary to answer this prayer in the silence as well as in the active. Patron Saint of the Family, guide me with your prayer to the works God has prepared within me, those works of great love He wills for me.

Lord God, Eternal Father, grant this prayer and petition in the name of your Son, our Lord Jesus Christ who lives and reigns forever with you in the unity of the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever. Amen.

St. Joseph, Patron Saint of the Universal Church and of all families, pray for us!

Vocation: Moving from Despair into Mercy

Coming to dwell upon a momentary despair, one of the minor ones that precipitate a temptation to fall into a selfish burst, a moment turned inward—the following comes to mind, as though inspiration breathed in and a cool answer to a heated breath of dismay:

If one is tempted to self or unpurposed love of self, make an act of love in opposite, a small sacrifice of love—a prayer, a thought, a physical act (if possible) according to the state in life and relation, especially for those in the budding of vocation. Make it a point to cut against the grain, to rouse the senses to cooperation under the same mission as the intellect that ascends to and accepts in word a faith towards such a state, that begins in proto-form the desire to say "I do" or be consecrated towards the Kingdom at hand but needs a small act or, if you will, "a kiss to build a dream on." Make an act of love in this direction and in such a concrete way, even if the Beloved sees not. Do this, and you will have placed a brick upon the structure, the abode of love that you are building for the Other. Brick by brick, even if the Beloved does not accept such a gift, builds the home in which the Father bestows and desires each to dwell within. It is then a structure, an abode of love. Festooned with the flowers that burst into bloom and then fade as youth does, this abode will not later fade. Rather, it will be strengthened by each sweet act of charity. The investment being made will then pay dividends, not for oneself alone but—as one holding everything in common—for the community of believers. In this end, that immutable crown of glory will be yours and, with it, a Communion given by the One who has given it all, even His dearly beloved Son.

This is why it is right to say: "Conversion is where obedience turns into love."

So it is in pursuit, in the Courtship of the Daughter of the King... So must a "yes" be in preparation, for love requires a soil prepared in due time if the fruits of love are to be those that remain. Without Him, we can do nothing.

"And if I go and prepare a place for you,
I will come back again and take you to myself,
so that where I am you also may be. Where I am going you know the way." - John 14:3-4

These words strike me... they hold me in a great peace. What has He prepared? Much! And yet Thomas questions. It is enough to be with Him along the Way, peaceful with the great good given each in their own way. This is gratitude.

I am reminded of last Sunday morning, in preparation for Mass and entering into and serving in the Mass. Looking beyond my place towards the Altar—and this among other reasons is why I love 8 AM Mass so much—the light pierced through the east-facing windows before me with its light resting upon the chalice and purificator spent. It was for me, a profound and yet sublime example of love. It was love in the hidden—in the invisible made visible. That is what the Blessed Sacrament is. It is love spent for the good of the people, multiplied, and distributed. It is the wedding banquet, and my heart was glad.

It is in these moments I find great solace and remembrance of His love, "for his mercy endures forever." Not only this, I remember those whom I am so bound in prayer and affection that tears of joy are recalled. I pray even now not out of a desire of being seen—this is the warning of Christ about the locked room of prayer—but out of deep reverence for the love He has placed for me that I am called to give in turn in specific, tender ways. These are like wounds that are opened and then re-heal, only to open again. This is the nature of compassion and of self-gift and love.

It is an honor to serve in lectoring at Mass, especially regarding last Sunday's reading and the rejoinder by St. Peter to be like "living stones." The greater gift received is the mere opportunity to see the work of God at work in us and through us that the light shines through and shows through the darkness of our own hearts His marvelous love. Namely, it is itself the receiving of Him in the Eucharist. There can be no greater, no further complete union of God and Man other than on Judgement Day. We must avail of it often and never grow weary to our need for conversion before approaching. Yet, through it all, we remember that "his mercy endures forever."

Amen.

Let Us Give Thanks...

Conversion is a day by day experience, as I was reminded to me in a homily a week ago, and day by day I know more why I continue to return... With the eyes of faith I recall the words of Peter: "Master, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life. We have come to believe and are convinced that you are the Holy One of God." (John 6:68-69)

But this isn't a begrudging answer or a return based on fear or weariness, even when I fail... It isn't as though it is a crutch. Why go to Mass then? Why return in community to the Eucharist?

Indeed, the Eucharist is having eyes for forever. It is the onward look towards Eternity, wrapped in a love deeper than the depths of the human heart. It is a Thanksgiving, rightly called so, because we do not earn it, but we are given it in our feebleness. It strengthens; it fortifies. It gives us new life... All because of HIS words... "I am the Bread of Life."

Let us "give thanks to the LORD, for he is good; his love endures forever!" -Psalm 107:1

Today I give thanks "for his mercy endures forever" (Psalm 107:1), and His beauty is ever before me, whether before me at home or in Rome.

The beauty I seek, that I yearn most deeply for, is before me always. It is his mercy that endures forever and my heart is glad, glad for a shepherd whose voice I hear from the ends of the earth to home. My heart is glad for Him Who Is and for the gifts of Him.

My heart is glad for the gift of love for ones that are His, and I pray I may recall this even when that love is tested and purified, most especially when all that I desire is before me at the Altar of Salvation, at the Table of His Great Love, at the Banquet of the Great Communion of His Love. May I place it all upon the altar with the unblemished gifts and the works of our hands—all of it!

He purifies because He loves, and He loves because He wants us, all of us, to have life more abundantly.

Let us love through Him. Though Him, With Him, In Him... Now and Forever. Amen.

—Sunrise from the Coast of Italy, May 2, 2014

"They Were Cut to the Heart"

This phrase from the first reading today should strike us: “they were cut to the heart.” The phrase elicits a great deal of dramatic imagery, but it is no greater than the preceding imagery of “this Jesus whom you crucified.”

We all do share this need for forgiveness; we share a guilt in our turning to sin in our weakest moments. This forgiveness doesn’t come without a cost, nor does He force it without our participation in it. We are called to repent, often weeping in sorrow. We may believe all is lost—but there is great promise in the Resurrection, first of Christ and then for us through His Resurrection to our newness of life. We might not immediately recognize Him on the Way, but He will indeed call us by name. Then that once clouded visage will become clear in our midst. This is not simply a principle or an ideal. It is a person: Jesus Christ, through whom and with whom and in whom forgiveness and mercy is made manifest.

His mercy endures forever. Pray that the Holy Spirit may help our unbelief and that our Heavenly Father may forgive us our trespasses as we forgive others theirs on the Way.

• How do I handle my need for forgiveness?
• How do I choose to forgive others? Where can I find more opportunities to share my forgiveness of others and the hope that the Resurrection of Christ provides?

Originally published in:
Aggie Catholic: Year of Faith Lenten Reflections 2014
St. Mary's Catholic Center
aggiecatholic.org

The Resounding Note

Saturday was like peering deep into a wishing well and faintly seeing a reflection of the future despite the ripples of distortion. I found much to be comforted with, much to be concerned with, but all to be overjoyed with as timing, even for that day, was exactly to the point and circumscribed within God's blessed design. There were little hints everywhere; if we but only search for these joyful notes in spite of the cacophony surrounding, we would find our dwelling place secure.

I feel somewhat exiled from a past mixed with a delayed longing for a complex future, a restructured bond that hasn't quite reset. Some is but a deep nostalgia misplaced. However, so much remains fluid and in flux, except my desire to return in earnest and concerted steps through faith.The city of my birth, the city I returned to, is not whitewashed or even clean. It has its bruises, its diversions, and its divisions, but it is found lived in and experienced. Even so, there was cause for great joy that day: weddings! Weddings can be messy affairs, the mixing of two parts not quite similar. In the case of the one I stumbled across at the Cathedral played to the contrasts of the City... Outside the Cathedral in front of Jackson Square, there was a woman playing a full-size piano moved into the midst of the fortune tellers at the steps of the Cathedral. The other side of the Cathedral contrasted greatly with a parade for St. Patrick's Day with much useless noise that overpowered much in the Square, from the people streaming in for the wedding, to the more subtle sights and sounds... but for a moment all melted away and the silence of her piece amid the hustle and bustle of a tourist-filled space was all that could be heard... Much like prayer in a tempest. Like a decisive stroke of a master artist's brush completing a masterpiece, this flashed before me in silhouette.

Communication doesn't win by being the loudest but, rather, by being the most heartfelt, the most direct. All the garishness passes away at once, and one sees clearly the outline of a city and of the soul itself. Let us not forget to nourish our souls through earnest prayer and moments of silence throughout the day to mark the gifts and the struggles the Lord gives us to complete through Him.

Proclaiming the Word

In recalling the latest issues of communicating during these times of upheaval and questioning of morals and faith, face-to-face social interaction trumps online/social media interaction because it stings less when it is off-key. The bad word slips away never to be returned whence it came; it is still contained within the circle of speech surrounding the speaker. It may be carried again and again, yes, but as for the online world's interaction and its transmission... it is a wildfire without a firebreak, an echo chamber without dampeners, a cacophony in darkness, a canary in a coal mine.

Still, we are called to proclaim into the darkness to proclaim anew, "I am the voice of one calling in the wilderness, 'Make straight the way for the Lord.'"

These verses follow the other, and they should not be seen as disjointed or separate. They are in the same breath, and we shouldn't forget it:
"'This I command you: love one another.
If the world hates you, realize that it hated me first.'" - John 17:17-18

We must still act with charity in our comments in person or online, but true charity never ignores the truth. No, it embraces truth with gusto and looks for the excuse of the other as ignorance of it. Then armed with no other weapon than the evidence before God and man, the one with true charity goes to meet the person where they are in fraternal correction and prays twice as long for him and his brother and the conversion of himself and his brother, for his brother is not the world but is in it.

"Have mercy on us, O Lord...
For we have sinned against you.

Show us, O Lord, your mercy....
And grant us your salvation."

"The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it." - John 1:5

Prepare the Way

O Lord, guard my heart.
When love's arrow misses its mark,
guide me back to your Sacred Heart.
When I grow weak to the voices from without,
give me your grace to return and never again depart.

Lead me that I may follow and lead others in your stead:
for those in need of being fed,
of those who have bled,
and for those who believe in all those words you have said.
Lead me to you.

Bring me to the place you have prepared for me,
for the works you have prepared for me to enter into.
Let not my heart's questions quiet the call you have given.
Let me see the splendor you have given for the Church in miniature.
Let me see the splendor!

Prepare the Way. Prepare the Way of the Lord!

 

O Division...

O division, why your sting?
Why the separation, the strife, the desolation?
Where is your end, O division of hearts?

Lead us, Lord, to sing with one voice
Where there were once many...
Where as one family we can sing
Of Your peace, of Your Love,
As part of Your Holy Family!
Lead us, O Lord, to sing!

Abba! Father!

"But for the Grace of God Go I..."

Remembering that you are forgiven is a relieving truth. Even greater is the truth that you have that gift for others. Love is not lost in the loosing act of forgiveness but in the binding of the unforgiving act of a hard heart towards self and others. This is the most debilitating action one can choose; it is a failure to forgive, a détente of false peace when true peace is attainable and promptly accessible if one only acts. It is a failure of proper perspective and self-worth.

But for the grace of God go I... Grace because I could not persist in hope by my affliction alone. Hope because hope sees through the thin veneer of the present. Affliction because the present has not been made the future at once. Love because Love does not count the hours against the Beloved until the words are spoken: "Forgive us of our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us."

Guard jealously the forgiveness you've been given. Do not let it be taken away willingly or in piecemeal to doubt or temptation. You have sought forgiveness, and it has been given to you. Do not let temptation hold its sway to the lies and its progenitor.

You have been washed in the Blood of the Lamb. Do not sully your bright white garment. Do not sin. His gift is greater than the temptation at hand to fall. Remain close to Him. His grace is sufficient.

The Active and the Contemplative

I rest on the active in the contemplative and the contemplative in the active. O, this state of melancholy! The rest one gains in this state is one of exhaustion of day and not the release of it. I know not if to figure it to be grace or vice—only that both the active and the contemplative verily exists and are present within this state throughout.

Moving to to the active in the contemplative, is it to be a combustion, an undying fire of devotion? How can the active, that thing which is pent up as bound energy, be expected to remain as full as it was when it was first received and then given as it is meant to be have been now?

How can we not have some loss of this fervor? It must be then with a Eucharistic Heart that we press on in both the contemplative and the active! It must be through a completely thankful heart, a heart full of thanksgiving that we can be both active and contemplative. It is with a heart full of thanksgiving that we can respond to, even stave off, the unpurposed sadness of melancholy and turn it into something more.

What next then? What do we do with this knowledge? We serve. How do we serve? With thanksgiving for His Love, for His Gift—timeless and unrepeatable—yet present in the Eucharist. It is here that the nexus of the active and the contemplative rests. It is the crossing of the two, and it is the stage of our lives. We live out the Eucharist by living out His Love.

And so His Love is this: selfless in its pursuit, relentless in its opportunities, shameless in its multitude of gifts, endless in its joy and fulfillment it brings.

Let us be One with this dynamic love. Let us live out His Love. Let us be One.

Not to us, Lord, not to us but to your name give glory because of your mercy and faithfulness.
Why should the nations say, “Where is their God?”
Our God is in heaven and does whatever he wills.
...
May you be blessed by the Lord, maker of heaven and earth.
The heavens belong to the Lord, but he has given the earth to the children of Adam.
The dead do not praise the Lord, not all those go down into silence.
It is we who bless the Lord, both now and forever.
Hallelujah! - Psalm 115:1-3, 15-18

If I Could Dream a Dream

If I could dream a dream, I would dream one of you. We do these things and the other things not because they are easy, but because they are hard. If I could, I would right now, dream beyond this world and place, to another, to a far different place. If I could muster a voice strong enough, innovative enough, I would voice one strong enough for you.

If I could go to the Moon and snatch it, from the deepest reaches of the mind, and grab it, I would bring it to you— no different, no surprising than a smile before your face. If I could, I would fight the darkness that abounds, the battles that are found. I would fight them for you.

If I could do nothing more than love you, to bring everything before you, I would. I would bring every last morsel, every drop to drink. I would bring them to you. If I could gather all to you under the roof of love and sustain you because of this, I would. I would bear all things for you.

If I could be light for your light, to bring that light to this world of darkness, I would. I would carry it forward, to every crevasse, every valley, every pit of darkness. If I could, I would carry it for you. If I could in all I do, I would be light for you.

If I could be love for your love, a smiling face, a turn of grace—one to love in your very place—I would bring them all, all of them to love. If I could be love, then maybe I would understand. I would understand your plan. If I could be love, then I would understand.

If I could understand the world, its ways, its many shades of gray, what would I stand to lose in you? If I could stand beneath this waterfall of grace, would I not be washed from my pain? If I could stand with you, I would sing with a voice renewed, a voice in Truth.

If I could stand firm with your grace, I would spread your fragrance to every place. With every step, let me stay with you. If I could bring the world to you, I would. If I trust you in all steps lit by lamp, I would be secure in each step. If I would only trust, I would find the path to you.

If I could find that voice, one of love to give, one strong enough to live each day secure, I would be strong enough, strong enough for you. If I could dream the dream of love, I would dream one of you. I would dream a dream of you.

On Bended Knee

On Bended Knee,
I come this day to pray.
On Bended Knee,
I come to give You praise.

On Bended Knee,
I find my true self.
On Bended Knee,
I find You alive this day.

On Bended Knee,
I am compelled to stay,
To remain in Your love,
To be one with You.

On Bended Knee,
I see the one true God,
One unadulterated, One free,
One forever able, One in whom to believe.

On Bended Knee,
I find His mercy outpoured,
His love, His truth,
His glory forevermore.

On Bended Knee,
I see His presence
With sight, with sound,
With true feeling—Our Lord.

On Bended Knee,
I am enveloped completely,
In totality of Truth,
In love and mercy outpoured.

On Bended Knee,
I surrender to You,
Completely without reserve,
Without any other need.

On Bended Knee,
I seek only YOU,
My Lord, My God,
My whole being; I pray.

On Bended Knee
I thank You
For a centering peace,
A peace centered on You.

On Bended Knee
I shall remain,
To love evermore
With a heart you made.

Prayers & Supplications

Oh, how does my heart sing right now. It is with both a happy and heavy heart that I write tonight. For on the one hand, the Lord has granted my prayers, and on the other a friend's has yet to be answered.

Prayer is ironic. There is always the adage "watch what you ask for." This is certainly true and all-apparent. Even when I think I've worded well my prayers of petition, the Lord finds and speaks to my heart in another way. So I'll say it again: prayer is ironic.

For there are unanswered prayers. Ones that we think we receive no answer to. This type of prayers exists, but does it really in this same sense? I think not. For all prayers are answered, each in their own turn. Some are answered even before you know it, and the Lord leaves it there to bear—even many years after you first pray over something—and what you've asked for is granted but possibly not in the way you first intended.

I have encountered this many times before, even to the point of being angry at God. Mind you, this was years ago, before I grew in my faith... before the bedrock was set beneath me. This anger was misplaced. It was a set of feelings of pain, of hurt, of sorrow, and of lost. We all feel these, and we all must learn to cope. Prayer is there to do just that.

I pray that, in this current time, the pain is washed away.

How do I wish that my prayers can wash away the pain that is present now. Pain release your hold of the hearts of the Faithful. Release your grip and allow for Love to enter. For God is Love and God became a man to save us all. Show us His Selfless Love, O Father. Show us your way, O Lord.

Have no anxiety at all, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, make your requests known to God.
Then the peace of God that surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is gracious, if there is any excellence and if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.
Keep on doing what you have learned and received and heard and seen in me. Then the God of peace will be with you. – Philippians 4:6-9